4185619 2009年12月07日 19:51 阅读(loading...) 评论(0) 分类：个人日记
 
        1. 隔壁那小子终于发誓要减肥了――毕业**会上，有人对他说了句：“哥们，让一下，你挡着我的手机信号了。”
　　2. 雷锋做了好事不留名，但是每一件事情都记到日记里面。
　　4.逃课太多，昨天想去上课，见到教授，教授惊讶地说，这么长时间不见，长这么大了。
　　5.我左青龙，右**，肩膀纹个米老鼠。
　　6.每当我错过一个女孩，我就在地上放一块砖，于是便有了长城。
　　7.鸳鸯戏水，都他妈淹死；比翼**，都他妈摔死。
　　8.纯，属虚构，乱，是佳人。
　　9.幸福就是痒的时候挠一下，不幸就是痒了但挠不着，更不幸的是，很久以来灵魂和肉体都感觉不到那种蠢蠢欲动的痒了。
　　10. 我虽然做不了有钱人的后代，但我一定要做有钱人的祖宗。
　　11.天没降大任于我，照样苦我心智，劳我筋骨。
　　12.谁，执我之手，敛我半世癫狂；谁，吻我之眸，遮我半世流离。
　　13.众里寻她千百度，蓦然回首，那人依旧对我不屑一顾。
　　14.念了十几年书，想起来还是幼儿园比较好混。
　　15.什么是幸福？幸福就是猫吃鱼，狗吃肉，奥特曼打小怪兽。
　　16. 阁下莫非就是当年华山论剑武工独步天下罕有其匹号称一朵梨花压海棠的少林寺智障大师收养的小沙弥低能的爱犬旺财踩扁的蟑螂小强曾滚过的一个粪球？
　　17.短篇小说我爱你母亲的上半部分，今天就播送到这里，明天同一时间请继续欣赏，我爱你母亲的下半部分……
　　18.地铁上的广告：挤吗？买辆车吧！出租车上的广告：堵吗？坐地铁吧！
　　19. 我接到一个手机短信，动物园有只猴子奇丑无比，人见人吐，有一天我去了我吐了，有一天你去了,nike air force 1 for cheap，猴子吐了。
　　20.说金钱是罪恶，都在捞；说美女是祸水，都想要；说高处不胜寒，都在爬；说烟酒伤身体，都不戒；说天堂最美好，都不去！
　　21.强烈抗议广告时间插播电视剧！
　　22.谢谢你，谢你大爷，谢你全家，谢你祖宗十八代。（见过这样感谢别人的吗？）
　　23.名花虽有主，我来松松土！
　　24. 对不起！我已经死了！不过谢谢你来看我！今天晚上12点我也去看你！
　　25.我喝酒是想把痛苦溺死，但这该死的痛苦却学会了游泳。
　　26.数据显示，2008年中国男性占全国总人口的52%，女性占43%。 （天涯-柴哥的经典作，太他妈强悍了）
　　27.你想发财吗？你想交桃花运吗？你想当官吗？你想一夜成名吗？你想永葆青春吗？
　　―-不要瞎想了，好好学习吧！
　　28.傻子偷乞丐的钱包，被瞎子看到了，哑巴大吼一声，把聋子吓了一跳，驼子挺身而出，瘸子飞起一脚,women nike dunk，通辑犯要拉他去公安局，麻子说，看我的面子算了。
　　29.孤单是一个人的狂欢，狂欢是一群人的孤单
　　30. 一定要糊涂，不要追求真理…真理是婊子!
　　31.做梦梦见吃意大利面，早上醒来发现鞋带没了！
　　32.爱人是路，朋友是树，人生只有一条路，一条路上多棵树，有钱的时候别迷路，缺钱的时候靠靠树，幸福的时候莫忘路，休息的时候浇浇树。
　　33.铁杵能磨成针，但木杵只能磨成牙签，材料不对，再努力也没用。
　　34.留了青山在，还是没柴烧。
　　36.天天吃稀饭，不甘心，昨天去菜市场绕了一圈，我想我还是继续吃稀饭吧。
　　37.我的原则是：人不犯我，我不犯人；人若犯我，我就生气！
　　38.我慢慢发现，人才是妖精！有些妖精吃人，但人什么都吃,black nike air force 1，逮着一只妖精没准也能烧烤了！
        39.听君一席话，圣斗士念书。
　　41.地理老师：如果地球不转了，我们的世界将会如何？
　　小B同学：就算地球不转了，我们还是要围着以胡主席为中心的党中央继续转
　　42.你看，人世间总有那么多的事情让你伤感：阴晴圆缺，悲欢离合，阳痿早泄。。。。
　　44.炮轰的脑袋还梳个雷劈的逢。
　　45.爱是一种奢侈品。如同巴黎橱窗里的狐皮大衣，那么眩目、那么迷人，可是上面的标价会让人清醒过来。爱亦是奢侈品，只能远远的看着，别幻想或触摸它因为那需要合适的时间、合适的人相遇在合适的地点，缺一不可。
　　46.出问题先从自己身上找原因，别一便秘就怪地球没引力。
　　47.虽然我长的不是很帅，但小时候也有人夸我左边鼻孔很偶像派。
　　48.老规劝：闺女，要适当吃一点才有劲减肥啊。
　　49.春天是感冒和感情高发的季节。有人不小心感冒了，有人不小心恋爱了，我属于前者。
　　50.我当年也是个痴情的种子，结果下了场雨……淹死了。
　　51.红杏不出墙，坚决拽出来。
　　52.我允许你走进我的世界，但绝不允许你在我的世界里走来走去。
　　53.就算我是一只癞蛤蟆，我也坚决不娶母癞蛤蟆。
　　55.钱可以买房子但买不到家，可以买婚姻但买不到爱情，可以买钟表但买不到时间，钱不是一切，反而是痛苦的根源。把你的钱给我，让我一个人承担痛苦吧！
　　56.男孩穷着养,supra muska skytops，不然不晓得奋斗：女孩富着养，不然人家一块蛋糕就哄走了,classic tall ugg boots。
　　57.年轻的时候，我们常常冲着镜子做鬼脸；年老的时候，镜子算是扯平了。
　　58.我以后生个儿子名字要叫“好帅”，那别人看到我就会说:“好帅的爸爸！”
　　59. 鱼说：我时时刻刻把眼睁开是为了在你身边不舍离开。水说：我终日流淌不知疲倦是为了围绕你，好好把你抱紧。锅说：都快熟了还这么多废话。。
　　60. 幸福就是：我饿了，看见别人手里拿个肉包子，他就比我幸福；我冷了，看见别人穿了一件厚棉袄，他就比我幸福；我想上茅房，就一个坑，你蹲那儿了，你就比我幸福。
　　61.每个人至少拥有一个梦想，有一个理由去坚强。
　　62. 5岁的女儿让老爸帮她做某事。老爸：“爸爸很累啦，你夸我两句吧，你夸我两句我就又有劲了。” 女儿：“老郑！”老爸：“哎！” 女儿：“你家妞妞长得可真漂亮啊……”
　　64.心若没有栖息的地方，到哪里都是在流浪！
　　65.大脑是最高贵的器官�因为是大脑告诉你的。
　　67.诸葛亮出山前也没带过兵啊，你们凭啥要我有工作经验！！！
　　68.工作的最高境界就是看着别人上班，领着别人的工资。
　　69.小时候不学习，妈妈说：“长大后让你嫁给卖猪肉的王老五。”现在我教育女儿： “好好学习，长大后才能嫁给卖猪肉的王老五。”
　　70.活了二十多年，没能为祖国、为人民做点什么，每思及此，伤心欲绝。
　　71.快乐？快还能感觉到乐？！
　　73.妈妈说人生最好不要错过两样东西：最后一班回家的车和一个深爱你的人。
　　74.80后的重要任务就是制造08后。
　　75.人生没有彩排，每天都是直播，不仅收视率低，而且工资不高。
　　76.前途是光明的，道路是没有的。
　　77.谁说天下乌鸦一般黑？其实一个更比一个黑！
　　79.好想来一次安静的认真的努力的唐吉坷德式的单恋……
　　80.要不是为挣钱，脸要来做什么…
　　81.吃不到天鹅～我还不能吃只鸭子么～
　　82.长得像坨屎也就算了,为什么非要做一坨屎?
　　85. 每天早上起来大吼一声：“操**的小日本。”这样既有益身体健康，又培养了爱国主义道德情操！
　　90.小姐的胡须长得如此委婉，想必是位大家闺秀咯！
　　91.你爹娘用那10分钟来散步多好啊!
　　92.工作好有意思耶! 尤其是看着别人工作…
　　93.你被打胎后是怎么从垃圾桶里逃出来的?
　　95.爱国爱家爱师妹,防贼防盗防师兄～
　　96.我真的不愿意用脚趾头鄙视你。但兄弟，是你逼我这么做的。
　　97.人生最残酷的地方是人只能年轻一次。
　　99.大学的爱情纯真在于能够共同吃方便面，能够谦让着喝汤。
　　100. 大哥…我对灯发誓…我真抽了…
 
 标签: 王老五 癞蛤蟆 半世 祖宗 奢侈品
 
 
|返回日志列表
 
 Topics related articles：
 
 
   kobe shoes on sale -你错了
 
   retro nike running shoes -
 
   paul smith tshirts -

awesome list indeed. thanks for putting them all together.

very helping tips.thanks for sharing it.

all users have shared very nice and useful forum lists. thanks a lot of all of you.,ugg boots nederland, ugg boots koop, ugg boots sale, ugg australia boots

great list,ugg boots nederland, ugg boots koop, ugg boots sale, ugg australia boots, this was very usefull information for us.

you made some good points there. i did a search on the topic and found most people will agree with your idea.,ugg laarzen,ugg australia laarzen, ugg laarzen nederland

A Faux Pas Is A Mistake In A Tuxedo
Everyone who is anybody has a hobby or at least entertains the idea. Hobbies range from sports to crafts to reading and even traveling. Some hobbies don't make sense to me like collecting dead insects.My long established hobby has earned me a membership in the POP (People Observing People) Culture. The rules specify that each member must swear not to divulge anything observed.Being a minister, I'm not allowed to swear, so I am exempted from this rule.I love to get a nice hot cup of coffee,doudoune moncler pas cher, a local newspaper and situate myself where I can see the most people in their natural environment. Nothing is more hilarious than observing people who don't realize they are being watched.Don't get me wrong here, I love people. All sorts of people. I would never unduly make fun of anyone - well almost anyone. Everybody has something about him or her interesting and worth observing.One of my favorite authors, F. W. Boreham, made this observation: Leave your house early in the morning and the first person you meet take him or her aside and write their biography. Of course, the person will not conceive anything interesting about his or her life, and that's the way most people are. We think everybody else is more interesting than our life.The average person, in my opinion, leads a more interesting life than almost all celebrities,abercrombie, except for Elvis who is more popular dead than alive.As an expert in the POP Culture, the most interesting thing about people can be summed up in one word: mistakes.Mistakes are the common characteristics of all those addicted to oxygen. Other similarities exist among people, but this one thing supercedes culture,louboutin, time,louboutin pas cher, age and gender. Everybody at some time to some degree makes mistakes.Two kinds of people populate our planet: those who admit their mistakes and those who don't.Now,doudoune moncler, a mistake is not just a mistake. There are categories and degrees of mistakes. Let me list a few categories and see which one fits into your lifestyle.The first category would be, inaccuracies. It is easy to get something wrong when dealing with numbers, especially dialing telephone numbers. Not long ago my wife, who works as my secretary, dialed a number for me. I can't remember now who we were trying to call, but I do remember who we really got.My wife dialed the number and as soon as it started to ring, she handed the phone to me. When I put the receiver to my ear, I heard a sultry voice invite me to do things I had never considered before in my life.Her words sent shockwaves down to the soles of my feet and back to the top of my head, only to repeat the procedure several times. I had heard of such things but I never heard it personally.I immediately scowled at my wife and demanded, "What number did you dial?""I dialed the number you gave me," she said rather flippantly."Okay," I quipped,moncler, "listen to this."I handed the telephone back to her and watched her eyes explode and her mouth drop open. She quickly gave it back to me, but I didn't want it either.Inadvertently, she had dialed some phone sex number. We both went to the restroom to wash out our ears.Another category,piumini moncler, omission. This is where I get into a lot of trouble with my wife. It is not that I'm negligent but I do have the odd moment where certain bits of information are temporarily obscure from any immediate recall. Like when I go to the grocery store for my wife and get everything but what she sent me for in the first place.How this happens befoggles my mind.Misunderstanding represents another category. I really do not understand this one. I have been accused of misunderstanding some very simple instructions from You Know Who.I sincerely miss my understanding but for now, I'll simply overlook it.Blunder is still another category of mistakes. In this group, the mistake is rather innocent. It might be a result of some tiny oversight. After all, nobody can see and remember everything.If there were awards for blunders, I would have a shelf full of trophies.The list can go on and on. However, my experience as a card-carrying member of the POP Culture brings me to the conclusion that the quintessential mistake is the faux pas. If anyone knows about mistakes, it is the French. Just saying it gives one the feeling of something tremendously special.A faux pas is simply a mistake in a tuxedo.A faux pas can cover any and all mistakes. A simple procedure is associated with this. When you realize that you've just committed a faux pas, place three fingers from your right hand, never your left and never four fingers although two will work fine,giubbotti moncler, across your mouth while extending your pinky. Then giggle and say,louboutin pas cher, "Oh, pardon my faux pas." Then roll your eyes upward.This is most useful when in heavy traffic and you've just cut in front of another driver. Your faux pas gesture will be immediately acknowledged by the driver in the car extending a solitary digit upwards. This is merely a friendly gesture recognizing your faux pas.Of course, the superb response to every mistake is found in the Bible. "Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much." (James 5:16 KJV.)As someone once said,moncler pas cher, "confession is good for the soul." Do a little soul-work this week.The Reverend James L. Snyder is an award winning author whose writings have appeared in more than eighty periodicals including GUIDEPOSTS. In Pursuit of God: The Life of A. W. Tozer, Snyder's first book, won the Reader's Choice Award in 1992 by Christianity Today. Snyder has authored 8 books altogether.Rev. James L. Snyder has a knack for making fun of daily frustrations and will increase the humor aptitude of your readers so they too can discover that life is less stressful when you're laughing. Through these essays, your readers will realize that humor and religion belong together and can keep them from taking themselves and others too seriously.
相关的主题文章：
 
 
   返还税金作为企业发展的专项基金
 
   and I use the word useless to mean that although they generate a lot of traffic
 
   //www.notepage.net and FeedForAll http
 
 
Glenn Close was named best actress in a drama show for her role as a ruthless lawyer in the series Damages.  She praised the other nominees, including Sally Field of the series Brothers and Sisters and Holly Hunter of Saving Grace.

this list helped me a lot! thank you good man ,ugg laarzen,ugg australia laarzen, ugg laarzen nederland, ugg laarzen outlets!!

i heard exactly the opposite in the last time more and more often.,Air Max Schuhe, Nike air Max Schuhe, ,Airmax schuhe, nike air schuhe, air Max Schuhe günstig, air Max Schuhe deutschland